Insomnia strikes again! Usually I’m up at 3 am but I guess after taking two mini naps during the day I had a bit of a hard time falling asleep (I know, not exactly rocket science to figure that one out).
I have to report that I had SEVEN wonderful days, mostly all pain-free! It was like human life and energy re-inhabited my body again and I started dreaming up all kinds of new things to do. I cooked and cleaned, went places, did some shopping, completely organized the baby’s room, and even tried to work (but I wasn’t needed for the shift I signed up for so I got cancelled). It was lovely. I am so incredibly thankful!
Today I had a routine appointment with my OB and she was thrilled to hear that I had been feeling better. When I told her I was hoping to return to work again, her eyebrow went up and she gave me a concerned look. She discouraged me from working and told me that the baby was in a good position now but that he could move at any time and I might be right back to where I started. Hmm. I hadn’t really thought that would be the case. We talked a bit more about it and I told her I would really consider her advice.
I came home from my appointment to discover that our refrigerator and freezer weren’t working. So I spent most of the afternoon dealing with that– transferring all our freezer items to our chest freezer in the garage (thank goodness we have that chest freezer!). I wasn’t sure if the fridge was broken at that point too so I ran to the store and bought a refrigerator thermometer. And for some reason, at that point I was feeling pretty lousy. My belly was seriously hurting. I realized too that I felt utterly exhausted, so I took a nap. Woke up a little bit later and ate some food and checked the thermometer in the fridge. 46F. Kind of warm. I thought about running to the store again to grab some ice (so I could transfer all our food into an ice chest) but I still felt crummy so again I took another nap! At 6pm we had a Late Pregnancy class at the hospital which included a tour of the labor and delivery and postpartum units. It was helpful, but I was disappointed to hear that they will be transferring me to a postpartum room as little as one hour after giving birth. Talk about in and out! After we got home we discovered that the fridge had not miraculously healed itself and the temperature was now 52F. So my very tired hubby ran out to get some ice and we transferred everything from the fridge to ice chests. Broken appliances are a time sucker (not to mention a money sucker). We are praying that our 15 year old fridge is only ‘mostly’ dead and not ‘completely’ dead.
With me not working, we are working hard to scrimp and save and live by a very strict budget. My husband is an excellent provider, and in the past few months we have been focusing on saving for unforeseen expenses as well as known expenses. That way, if something major breaks, it won’t kill us! But what that means is that it leaves quite a bit less to live on if I’m not working. We had been given the recent news that the head gasket in my car is reportedly leaking and could blow at any time, and now our fridge is broken. I had been hoping I would be back to work soon but today as I lay in bed with the heating pad on my belly I realized that wouldn’t be happening either. The pain has returned. I’m ashamed to admit that I cried, because it showed not only that I was hoping in my own ability to work and help cover some of these expenses (instead of asking the Lord for it) but it also shows an ungrateful heart for the past seven wonderful days where I felt so much better. Thankfully, at that point my husband and I prayed together and asked the Lord to provide, and to help us to put our hope in Him and not in either of our abilities to work. I felt so much better after we prayed. These are stretching times, but good times. I know I’m learning to trust the Lord in new ways and that is always a good thing. I’m also learning to live without things I always thought I needed, and I’m discovering just how freeing that can be!
So the pain is back but who knows, maybe it won’t be as bad this time around? My friend texted me these verses below today. What a timely reminder that hardships are always worth it.
“Not only that, but we rejoice in our sufferings, knowing that suffering produces endurance, and endurance produces character, and character produces hope, and hope does not put us to shame, because God’s love has been poured into our hearts through the Holy Spirit who has been given to us.” Romans 5:3-5
And now I just have to share some pictures from my baby shower last weekend. My mother in law, Cheryl, did such a lovely job! The theme was Peter Rabbit. My sister in law also helped plan the event but she was sick that day and couldn’t make it. 😦
Unfortunately we didn’t get a group photo until after a lot of people had to leave! But here are many of my good friends and family… what a blessing to be surrounded by people I love!
My mom on the left and my mother in law on the right. I am incredibly blessed by these two women!
This was the dessert! Yummy!
This gift made me cry. My dear friend Terri has prayed faithfully for me for a long time– even back when I was having my very first surgery for endometriosis. She has encouraged me so much along our infertility journey, and she gave me this wonderful wall hanging which couldn’t be more true!
This giant picture of Peter Rabbit was perfect!
Lastly, I realized I never posted any pictures from my first baby shower, which was back in November when I was only 23 weeks along. My mom and sisters hosted a smaller shower during that time so my sister (who was visiting from overseas) could be a part of it. The theme was “Something Special is Growing!”
Each person got a plant to take home with them to represent our growing baby and God’s faithfulness.
My older sister did a devotion with the group and shared our story for those who didn’t know all the details. Most importantly, she gave glory and honor to God for our little miracle!
Can’t leave out the food!