Well, here’s a post I never expected to write.
We’re going through IVF again!
(As a recap – to anyone new to this blog, we went through IVF back in 2013 and have 2 beautiful children now.)
I think the year of 2013 was such an incredibly painful year for me physically that IVF has left a few scars on me. I really wasn’t interested in going through it again! I had surgery just prior to IVF (for endometriosis) and then as anyone who’s been through IVF knows that the meds for IVF/ pregnancy are a bit on the brutal side (7 weeks of IM progesterone injections, anyone?), and then I had a horribly painful pregnancy with adhesions ripping apart as baby grew. So, whenever the thought of doing IVF crossed my mind I immediately thought: No thank you!
But then I prayed about it. I love our children so much and I’m so grateful to be a mother. And before long the idea of IVF didn’t sound as terrible anymore. Not only that, we now had an option for insurance to over almost all of the cost, including meds! I broached the subject with hubby, and I can’t remember if he immediately (or eventually) said “no,” but either way, the answer was the same. I actually wasn’t too grieved about it at the time. But I did (sneakily) continue to pray about it. And over time, my husband brought it up again and put the whole idea back on the table! My extremely intelligent, introverted, noise-hating husband said he would love to have more children! My mind was blown.
We moved forward from there and (together) kept praying about it. I kept waiting for the door to close on the whole idea, and if I’m honest I’m still a little mentally there. I just can’t believe we’ve made it this far! I thought the door was closing when my initial labs came back really terrible back in November. My day 2 FSH was 24.7, and my AMH was 0.2. I shook my head when I saw the results – there aren’t many IVF clinics that will even take you as a patient if your FSH was over 15, and mine was way higher! I kept praying. And I did a lot of research. At the end of the day, even if we only had a 1% chance, I still wanted to try. Insurance would be paying for it… and I’m 35 with extremely low ovarian reserve (thanks to too many surgeries on my ovaries) — in other words, this was really our last chance before I hit premature ovarian failure (that’s a code term for ‘early menopause’).
I went to my first IVF appt and I couldn’t believe that my IVF dr even agreed to see my given my lab results. But he did an ultrasound and my AFC (antral follicle count) wasn’t dismal at all – I think I had 12 follicles or so? He agreed to let us give IVF a try! Then he had me repeat my day 2 labs and they came back waaaay better – my FSH was 9.7! I couldn’t believe it!
And so here we are. I’m on day 3 of stim meds, 300 IU of Follistim and 150 IU Menopur. (Same dosage as last time around.) At my last ultrasound there were 12/13 follicles, which boggles my mind. I honestly though that when my FSH levels came in at 24.7 that I would be lucky to have 3 or 4 follicles.
In the meantime I’m happy to have my 2 little distractions and thankful to the Lord for this unexpected opportunity to go through IVF again! Last time I was an emotional wreck (couldn’t even bring myself to blog about it) but this time I am trusting God that His plan for the future is BEST, whether my cycle gets cancelled, or I don’t get pregnant, or I end up getting an BFP. I’ll be pretty bummed if it doesn’t work out… but I know that God is good and that His plans are for the best.
I will try to keep you updated on how it goes. Thanks so much for your prayers for us!
“He only is my Rock and my salvation, my fortress; I shall not be shaken.” Psalm 62:6