Tag Archives: abdominal pain

Endometriosis: Is it Coming Back?

It’s 2 am and I’m sitting here wondering: Is the endometriosis coming back? Little by little, the pain has started to return with each subsequent cycle¬†that I have had since Rachel was born. I sat up in bed last night and a very sharp pain in my lower right side took my breath away for a few minutes. The same pain had occurred the day before. There is now a dull ache in my side, almost like my ovary is tacked up against my abdominal wall. It’s a pain I am all too well familiar with.

The other thought I had, which seems much more unlikely, was an ectopic pregnancy. I only have one fallopian tube, and I’m pretty sure it’s mostly or completely blocked, based on the last hysterosalpinogram I had years ago. Although I am high risk for an ectopic pregnancy, it’s seems pretty unlikely that I’d been feeling pain from such this early on in my cycle (I think I’m on CD 25).

I’m tempted to feel frustrated that I seem to have crazy aggressive endometriosis, but miraculously we have two children (despite thinking I would need a hysterectomy 3 years ago). If there’s anything I’m learning these days, it’s that the past does not necessarily predict the future, and despite my best guess– I actually have no idea what God has for our future. I’m learning to stop making assumptions. So I don’t know if this means that more exams, ultrasounds and surgeries are in my immediate future. I don’t know if it means we will be able to have more children. But I do know that God can do anything, and that His plan is always best. (And His plans are usually a complete shock to me.)

In the meantime, I’m attempting to wean Rachel. The reasons for this are complicated and varied, and it’s going about as well as trying to get a lion to go on a vegetarian diet. She wants nothing to do with either the bottle or formula. She just wants to nurse, and it makes it doubly hard for this mama to see that. Weaning Josh was hard and yet still much easier than this, so I am not sure of the path forward from here. We’ve tried just about every trick in the book. I’m warming up formula at the moment that I’m 99% positive she will reject (but like I said, I don’t know the future!). Maybe this time she’ll take it. Or maybe we’ll still be at this in a few weeks — please say a prayer for us!

 

 

 

 

Advertisements

6 Comments

Filed under Baby, Endometriosis

Struggling to See

Hey y’all.

I’m writing through a bit of a fog right now. My belly pain has come back over the past week. Today it’s been at it’s worst, landing me in bed all day. I’m discouraged. We cancelled all our plans for the day and hubby has been such a tremendous help, running errands and taking good care of me. I’m thankful for him.

I have to keep reminding myself that I only have to get through 13 more weeks. 13 more weeks until we meet our son face to face. 13 more weeks that I will have to endure this debilitating pain. Or, maybe less if God chooses to give me a reprieve from it. Please pray with me that this will be the case.

It’s hard not to let pain taint your vision. Or poison your outlook on life. I have to remember that in almost all situations, pain is just for a season.

And so I think about joy. I must dwell on the things that I’m thankful for. I must ask the Lord to help me when I think I can’t keep living with this for 13 more weeks. He hears my prayers, and He always gives grace. He’s the ONE thing in this life that I can count on.

Thanks again for your prayers.

“The secret to joy is to keep seeking God where we doubt He is.” — Ann Voskamp, One Thousand Gifts: A Dare to Live Fully Right Where You Are.

Leave a comment

Filed under Pain, Pregnancy, Uncategorized